Have You Ever …  The Eyelash Edition

(Sometimes it’s the little things that trip me up, so I started this series last year – when ‘normal’ wasn’t the punchline of a very bad joke)

Have you ever …

… put on your glasses first thing in the morning and have one of the arms break off …

… and you search high and low for another pair of the same lens strength, but you can’t see a bloody thing because your glasses are broken … so you wear the broken ones until you find another pair …

…  and you put the new ones on and they’re OK for a little while … but you think there’s something on one of the lenses, so you take them off and clean them …

… and then you realise that these new glasses sit higher on the bridge of your nose and your eyelashes on one, (and one only) eyelid are brushing against the glass, EVERY TIME YOU BLINK …

One eyelash …on one eyelid

One eyelash …on one eyelid

… and because you’re conscious of this now, you start blinking even more …

… until finally you can’t stand it any longer and you decide that the offending eyelashes need to be trimmed, so you get the scissors and peer at your eyes in the bathroom mirror …

… but you have to take your glasses off to trim the eyelashes, but you can’t see without your glasses … so you poke the scissors up between your eye and glasses lens, but your lizard brain tells you this is a DANGEROUS thing to do and your eyes tear up and you can’t see what you’re doing anyway …

… so in the end you take your glasses off, hold the scissors horizontally and when you feel them touching your eyelashes, you gingerly snip at something and hope for the best?

Nah, me neither

Happy Glasses

Happy Glasses

 

30 comments on “Have You Ever …  The Eyelash Edition

  1. The final sentence is a relief

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Ellen Hawley says:

    I don’t think that, for all the odd things that have ever crossed my mind, cutting my eyelashes ever occurred to me as a possibility.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. jenanita01 says:

    I’m so glad you didn’t!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. quiall says:

    But that put a smile on my face an a chuckle in my throat! I’ll bet you thought about it . . .

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ack! Scissors near eyes! Ack!

    And eyelashes – wish mine were longer and thicker – not shorter!

    What were you thinking!!!

    You should write horror.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. selizabryangmailcom says:

    Got a pair of glasses from Lenscrafters and when I was trying them on, they were crooked. The lady kept taking them and putting them on the heat thing and then pushing on the arms to get them in a different position but nothing worked. My friend kept saying, “I don’t think it’s the glasses. I think it’s your head.”
    Not helpful.
    Glasses are still crooked to this day.
    But lashes intact.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. exhebdenmick says:

    Love this one!
    Whenever I try to use scissors and a mirror at the same time it always goes wrong. I just cannot get the hang of which way things work. I usually end up stabbing myself in some way or other. So now I just look at double vision as an opportunity to see things twice!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Olga Godim says:

    Ha! Your post reminded me of something that happened long ago, when I was in elementary school. Gosh, it was so long ago! I had a girl in my class, and one day she came to school with her eyelashes cut very short. It was the strangest view. The silly girl had heard that hair grows better when you cut it, and she wanted her eyelashes longer, so she cut them.
    I don’t remember what happened next, probably her eyelashes grew back, but I still remember the shock of seeing her with eyelashes cut off almost to the edge.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. LOL. I’m so glad you haven’t tried this!
    (Though it’s something I would do.)

    Liked by 1 person

  10. […] For this last week I’ve been telling myself I have nothing to blog about … which is why I haven’t posted anything since the ‘eyelash’ incident. […]

    Like

  11. Whew! I’m glad you didn’t do it!

    Liked by 1 person

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