Happy Birthday. It’s a rat!

Not exactly the post I planned as my reentry into regular blogging, I tell you!

Mrs Widds and I took a couple of weeks off recently to go do touristy things in the Kootenay Rocky mountain region of BC. I have pics of glaciers and snow-capped mountain tops, and we both realised we absolutely love breathing the air at 2000 meters above sea level.

So, that was going to be my lead-in story, however, the best laid plans of mice (rats, actually) and lesbians …

We’ve been aware of the pitter-patter of tiny clawed feet in the house for a few months now, but we thought that turning the house upside down looking for the little bugger would’ve scared it off.


We’re not heartless beasties so before we left, we set out a bit of fruit for it, just in case it decided, for some unknown reason, to stick around.

We arrived home from our adventures to the gutted skins of two bananas, and knew we’d have to take drastic steps.

We bought this:

Threshold of Doom on the right with sneaky trapdoor open

Threshold of Doom on the right with sneaky trapdoor open

‘Critter’, as we now called our diminutive (and as yet of undetermined species) houseguest, turned out to be smarter than the average bear, (probably not an actual bear though, probably) and eschewed falling for the old pile-of-nibblies-at-the-end-of-the-trap trick, so we resorted to the trail-of-seeds-to-the-opening-of-the-trap trick.

Side note: Mrs Widds has a thing about rats ever since one of her cats, long since departed via the Rainbow Bridge to the Summerlands, gifted her with a very large and very dead rat … on her bed … while she was sleeping … about a centimeter from her face.

Let’s all have a skin-crawling shudder at that image shall we?


Therefore, I was the designated remover of whatever species ‘Critter’ turned out to be.

For two nights Critter snacked on the dwindling number of seeds in front of the trap but didn’t cross the Threshold of Doom. It was all part of my Plan though.

Last night, having got Critter accustomed to finding food near the trap, I only put seeds inside it. Critter’s fate was sealed!

Overconfident, Critter crossed the Threshold of Doom and the trap snapped closed behind it .. just about the time Mrs Widds got out of bed. (She’s an early riser. Me? Not so much)

I felt a gently tap on my shoulder, and woke to the immortal words, “Happy Birthday. It’s a rat!”

To her credit Mrs Widds spoke softly, in spite of what she felt about the slithery, snickerly, squirmy, freaked-out RAT, bouncing around inside the trap, trying to escape.

I got dressed, released Critter-rat outside and fell back into bed.

I am 56. Bring on that second Saturn Return

31 comments on “Happy Birthday. It’s a rat!

  1. fromcouchtomoon says:

    Hahaha! *shudder* Hahaha!


  2. Happy Birthday. I just turned 65 (yes, it can be survived), and I have a chinchilla.

    Surprised you didn’t turn Rat into a pet.

    Glad you got a nice trip.


  3. Lucie from Butches Who Knit says:

    Happy birthday L!! Love across the ocean. And lol about The Rat.


  4. krisalex333 says:

    Happy birthday! 1958 produced a great vintage, don’t ya think? 😉


  5. Erin says:

    Yikes! I share Mrs. Widds’ antipathy to rats.

    Happy birthday!


  6. Olga Godim says:

    Happy birthday. Wonderful story!


  7. jmmcdowell says:

    Happy belated birthday! Although, I can think of lots of better gifts to receive on the day. 🙂 But then, isn’t the Year of the Rat a good one in the Chinese calendar? Maybe it’s a sign of good things to come!


  8. S.P.Bowers says:

    Hopefully you released it very far away from the house!

    Happy Birthday!


    • Widdershins says:

      Thanks …. yep, waaaaay down the end of the back yard. It scuttled under the chain-link fence that I rattled to give it’s scuttling extra impetus.


  9. clarbojahn says:

    Is that called “Have a heart trap?” We adopted two wild barn kitties that way through long gone son on way to Uni.

    That was fifteen years ago. We now have two not so affectionate but tolerable cats in our household.

    I”m 65. Made it this far. Happy belated birthday, L. I hope you got other b’day presents besides pet rat. Who may make a re entry into your life during the winter months. ( but now you have doom trap) 🙂


    • Widdershins says:

      Thanks Clar … I think it was called something prosaic like, ‘no-kill trap’.

      The rats of Widderlake are afraid, very afraid! Bwhahahahaha


  10. jannatwrites says:

    Happy birthday – I hope you got something besides rat 🙂 I hope he/she doesn’t have friends and family left behind in your house. Great plan for the capture, and subsequent release- I’m glad it worked out!


  11. Wow, what a birthday present! The universe has a strange sense of humor sometimes …

    Late happy birthday. 🙂


  12. cheriereich says:

    I’m glad you caught and released the rat. 🙂


  13. […] Mrs Widds has no great love for mammals of the order Rodentia. We had a bit of a rat problem here on Widder island last Autumn and she Was Not Pleased. […]


  14. […] my only post for September 2014 (I may or may not have deleted any others in the ‘Great Blog Post Emendation’ of July […]


  15. Sue Vincent says:

    The cat once dropped half a mouse in the bath with me as a gift… she never understood why I failed to appreciate it 😉

    Liked by 2 people

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