Have You Ever – Publishing Edition …

(Continuing my occasional series of weird and wonderful things that never, seriously, never happen to me, ever)

… slaved over a hot keyboard for seven months creating, from the five dimensions (at least) of your imagination, and then editing, a brilliant story filled with engaging characters, and drama galore …

… then formatted it for stage and screen digital and print editions …

…and then upload the digital versions and see nothing wrong them (this is important for later in the story) …

…only to discover, when you return to finish off the print formatting, that there are a few too many typos, that you’re sure you have already corrected, in the manuscript you’re working on …

… until you realise that in some unknown and probably unknowable way, you uploaded the WRONG BLOODY FILE, and didn’t even notice it?…

… so you go back to your clean copy and go through it with a paranoia-inspired fine-tooth comb, secure in the knowledge that no matter how obsessive you are, there will always be at least one typo that will escape detection …

… nah, me neither!

-oOo-

IMPORTANT NOTE: The clean files have been uploaded, and Amazon and Smashwords should clear them within the next 24 hours, so that those of you who have already bought your books can download the updated versions if you so desire. (it was mostly punctuation gaffes)

(For Amazon you need to make sure your device has ‘Automatic Book Update’ turned on – ‘Manage your Content and Devices’ in your Amazon account. Click the ‘Preferences’ tab. Scroll to ‘Automatic Book Update’. Choose ‘on’)

IMPORTANT LESSON: Be able to laugh at yourself, and have a back up plan!

We. Are. Live!!!

The Last Dragon In London (ebook version) is now live!

-oOo-

In the second decade of the Twentieth Century, Mildred Norman, Mildy to her friends, not many of whom are left alive, is broken in body and spirit after a long hard war.
An old friend suggests that she might like, as a bit of a distraction, to spend some time doing a bit of a ‘grand tour’ of all the places named ‘London’ throughout the world.
What begins as a whim, ends with a discovery that challenges everything she believes is possible.
Arriving in the last ‘London’, on her list, a tiny village tucked away in a remote valley, she meets up with a few of the locals and shenanigans ensue.
With the help of a child hunting mythical beasts, the child’s grandmother, and a cast of quirky villagers, Mildy shows how dangerous a stout woman with a lethal arsenal in her pockets can be.
She uncovers a plot to alter the course of history, begun so long ago that no records of the conspirators remain, except for one place, the place she now calls home.
To protect those she has come to love from certain destruction at the hands of a cruel and loathsome cabal, she must battle threats both near and far, and confront the mysterious force guiding it all.
And then, of course, there’s the question of dragons …

-oOo-

I’m still having a bit of a joust with the print version but that just means I can party again when that goes live too!

Herewith be the all important links:

SMASHWORDS: The last Dragon In London (in these formats: epub, mobi, (for Kindles) pdf, Irf, pdp, txt, and html)

AMAZON:

Canada – The last Dragon In London

USA – The last Dragon In London

UK – The last Dragon In London

Australia – The last Dragon In London

(and all the Amazon’s’ everywhere else too)

(it’ll take a couple of days but it should show up the catalogues for Apple, Kobo, Overdrive, Scribd, etc. Again, when I know you’ll know)

Tell your friends… tell their friends … tell random people on the street … erm … maybe not that last one. it might be going a bit too far.

Seriously though, if you like it, let me know, write a review, that sort of thing … if you don’t like it, well, constructive criticism is always welcome.

And just because it’s an awesome piece of art …

On With The Show!

Editing: Finished!

Only stage 3 of the whole process to go – the FORMATTING! (stage 1 – writing, stage 2 – editing)

If there was one thing I could tell someone to do if they’re completely bonkers enough to fall in love with this writing of tall tales business, it’s to not stop writing until they’ve reached ‘the end’. Then they can edit, judge, expand, and otherwise eviscerate, the end result.

It’s … exhilarating!

I’ve had a couple of days of feeling like I’m a lost sock in the washing machine of life, (normal after six months of concentrated concentration) now it’s …

On With The Show!

 

-oOo-

On a more prosaic note, I’ve had a fine joust with my new diabetes medication. The dosage was waaaay too high, and seeing as how some of the nastier side-effects were vomiting and diarrhea, I will leave it to your imagination as to what I’ve been going through from a digestive point-of-view – suffice it to say, not fun … but all digitalia crossed, my keel should be even from now on.

-oOo-

And now, the real reason I’ve asked you all here this evening. (cue dramatic music …)

 

Phew! That certainly was dramatic.

When I mentioned in my last post that I was still looking for the right cover art, (I had some very specific imagery in mind) Olga Godim offered to see what she might be able to create for me.

And create something for me, she most assuredly did!

Behold, the cover reveal and title reveal of my book …

Cover, revealed!

Cover, revealed!

Speaking of fantasies, if this series, yes it’s going to be a series, ever makes it to the ‘big screen’ or smaller ones, I want that piece of music as the theme music.

Still Editing

Still here.

Still too hot.

Still very thankful for our portable A/C.

Still … oh look at that. Final bloodtest results. Now I’m a diabetic.

Still think the universe isn’t out to get me.

Still looking for the right cover art for my book.

…

Thankfully it’s not the sort of diabeticals where I have to give myself injections. I’m not, erm, very comfortable with that concept.

Anyway … where would we be without Monty P …

 

6 Things I Learned Writing And Editing A Novel In Six Months

I’m pretty sure I’ve never done a ‘list-cicle’, so here we go my first and last … list!

Heh, the bastards are never really ‘DONE’ though, are they?

Mrs Widds and I will do a basic line edit/read-through, and then … depending on whether we find any clangers, it’s FORMAT TIME.

Here’s my list …

1 – I can write 2000+ words a day, (in a couple of hours sometimes!!!) and still have a life, and a relationship.

2 – I can write when I don’t have a clue what’s going to happen next, but trust that it will all make sense by the end. (and it did!)

3 – I can write when I have a migraine, vertigo, a migraine, sciatica, a migraine, an allergic reaction to the Covid vaccine, a migraine, emergency dental work, arthritic joints, (looking at you, knees) a migraine …

4 – I can write during a 42°C soul-crushing heatwave

5 – I can write when I’m So. Fucking. Exhausted. From #2 that I can barely focus.

6 – I am a Writing Titan!

Bonus – Always, always, keep a print copy. Always.

Always

Always

Extra Bonus – and apropos of nothing in particular, I found Lawrence of Arabia on YouTube.

22

 

(following on from 42)

That’s 22°C – which is the temperature outside our little cottage on Widder Island today.

I don’t think human bodies are designed to adapt to such drastic fluctuations. I know mine isn’t. If I had to save my life I could probably move faster than a snail on valium, but it’d be a close call.

On top of which … I had my second vaccine shot yesterday. I’m really hoping I don’t have the sort of reaction to this one that I did last time, but so far, it’s not looking good. Sore arm, hyper-sensitive skin, aching muscles, etc.

On top of which … vertigo migraines, probably also triggered by heat/temperature change.

On top of which … a little village called Lytton, just a few villages up the Fraser Canyon from us, and battling a wildfire in the mountains nearby, broke its own temperature record three days in a row, finishing with 49.6°C (121°F) the day before yesterday. Yesterday afternoon (30th June) it burned to the ground. The entire village. The residents had 15 minutes to evacuate.

I’m a bit of a cry-er. I feel happy, I cry. I feel sad, I cry. I hear bagpipes, I cry. (I know, that one’s weird) I’ve been crying off and on all day.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing. I’d rather be teary than squish everything down, but it’s really, really, exhausting.

I need a cuppa tea.

42

Heat Dome – the Equator’s revenge for all those arctic outflows.

I have been sweltering under a heat dome for the last three days and take great joy (sarcasm mode engaged) in knowing another three, at least, are immanent.

I do not approve of heat domes.

Thankfully we have our trusty portable air conditioner, who over the last two years has only had to run for a few days. So far its been going flat out for seven. (with breaks between the o’clocks of 2am and 9am)

The ‘42’ in the title doesn’t refer to Sir Douglas Adams’s answer to everything, It’s how hot it got today, 42°C. That’s 107° for the Fahrenheitists among us.

That’s an ugly heat folks, and I am done with it.

To those of you in the neighbourhood, (I’m talking geographical not geo-political) I hope you’re managing to stay cool and hydrated.

Mrs Widds Rides Again!

First she eviscerated and investigated.

Then she prognositcated.

“Hmm, needs a new carburettor. I shall install a new carburettor.”

New carburettor installed

New carburettor installed

Then she reassemble-erated …

“Why do I have always more bolts left over than I started with?”

Under the hood

Under the hood

Then she rehydrated …

An oil change really

An oil change really

And then .. she peregrinated …

My Bi-Annual Bloodletting, 2021-Style

Since my brush with cancer in 2013, I’ve had a blood-test every 6 months specifically to make sure my TSH hasn’t gone all squirrelly on account of not having a thyroid anymore, and the radiation therapy immediately proceeding its removal from my person.

Last year I escaped the bloodletting altogether. Our local hospital where I’d normally get such things taken care of didn’t want anything to do with me, and I certainly didn’t want anything to do with it.

I call 2020 the Year of Covid, and 2021 the Year of Consequences. Consequentially, last week I had my first blood-test since 2019, and because of this delay I was getting tested for everything I’d missed out on. Fasting was required.

(I don’t know about you but I find it a bit of a challenge to go out into the world after I’ve been crook for an extended period of time and I wasn’t completely myself after my vaccine shot)

This how it went down …

Clothes – Shoes and socks are weird.

In the car – OMG!!! Why is everyone driving so FAST?

At the hospital – Where’s my mask? Why won’t it fit properly? (trying to put the mask on over my glasses and my hearing aids) Also, I can’t breeeeeathe!

Waiting room – I’m #82. The display is stuck on #75, and I haven’t had anything to eat or drink (except water) since yester-bloody-day!

Bloodletting – Just exactly how many vials of blood are you taking? (answer – 7)

Back in the car – Mrs Widds had packed a thermos of tea, made just the way I like it. I love her.

Blast From The Past

On the 3rd of June 1967, William Joseph MacAalister died.

It was a senseless death born of the sexual repression and religious intolerance of the era and geographical location. (not that a lot has changed in the intervening fifty-plus years)

His body wasn’t found until some four days later. Given the time of the year he was interred with pragmatic haste. No autopsy was performed.

The local sheriff’s department conducted a cursory inquiry, questioning his peers and staff of businesses he was known to frequent. No further information was forthcoming.

His death was judged a suicide. No further action was taken.

in 1976 his story achieved world recognition and from that moment he became an icon for tortured youth, along with many other young men and women who lived and died in the shadows.

P.S. All of the above was made up, except that the movie ‘Ode to Billy Joe’, came out in 1976, and Bobby gentry released her song of the same name in 1967 … and of course, today is the 3rd of June!